Excerpt for Cow Jokes by , available in its entirety at Smashwords



Happy Birthday Jokes



By Arnie Lightning

Arnie Lightning Books

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Smashwords Edition



Copyright © 2014 by Hey Sup Bye Publishing

All rights reserved. This book is a work of fiction. No part of this book or this book as a whole may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or means without written permission from the publisher. Graphics used in this book are licensed and © Dollar Photo Club

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Table of Contents



Free Gift!

Cow Jokes

Maze 1

Maze 2

Maze 3

Maze 4

Maze Solutions

About the Author



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Click the link above to instantly download a free eBook! “It’s Okay to Be Different” is a beautifully illustrated story about accepting and celebrating others for their differences. It’s a great way to teach children to appreciate and accept others for who they are. Enjoy!

Cow Jokes

Q: What board game is a cow’s favorite?

A: Moonopoly!

Q: What is the definition of the moon?

A: The past tense of moo!

Q: What do you call a tired cow?

A: All milked out!

Q: What do you call a cow that does not give milk?

A: Milk dud!

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?

A: A bull dozer.

Q: What do cows usually fly around in?

A: Helicowpters and bulloons!

Q: What do cows get when they feel sick?

A: Hay fever.

Q: What is the golden rule for a cow?

A: Do unto udders as you would have udders do unto you!

Q: What happens when a cow stops shaving?

A: It grows a moostache.

Q: What do cows like to do at amoosement parks?

A: They like to ride the roller cowsters.

Q: What is a cow’s favorite game?

A: Moosical chairs!

Q: What animals do you carry around all day?

A: Your calves.

Q: What do you call a cow that plays music?

A: A moosician!

Q: What did one dairy cow say to another?

A: Got milk?

Q: How do you make a milkshake?

A: Shake up a cow.

Q: How does a cow do math?

A: With his cowculator!

Q: Where do baby cows go to eat?

A: The calf-ateria!

Q: Where did the bull carry his paperwork?

A: In the beef case!

Q: Why wouldn’t the cows leave the farm?

A: They were pasteurized!

Q: What would you get if you mixed a cow with a rabbit?

A: A hare in your milk!

Q: What U.S. state has the most cows?

A: Moosouri!

Q: Where do milk shakes come from?

A: From a nervous cow!

Q: Where do cows ride when on a train?

A: In the cowboose.

Q: What is a cow’s favorite moosical note?

A: Beef-flat!

Q: When a bull listens to his iPod, what does he put on his head?

A: His steer phones!

Q: Do cows go to Heaven?

A: Of course. It is a place of udder delight.

Q: What song did Michael Jackson’s cow sing?

A: Beef it!

Q: How did that bullfight turn out?

A: It was a toss-up!

Q: If you crossed a cow with a flock of ducks, what would you get?

A: Milk and quackers!

Q: Is there big money in the cattle business?

A: So I’ve herd (heard)!

Q: What do cows sing at birthday parties?

A: Happy birthday to MOO!

Q: What do you call a cow that fell into a hole?

A: A holy cow!

Q: What would you hear at a cow concert?

A: Moosic!

Q: What is a cow’s favorite hairstyle?

A: The cowlick!

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?

A: Spoiled milk!

Q: What do you call it when one cow spies on another?

A: A steak-out!

Q: What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?

A: Steer Wars.

Q: Why do cows like being told jokes?

A: They enjoy being amoosed!

Q: How come cows never have any money?

A: The farmer milked them dry!

Q: Where do cows go to dance?

A: The meat ball!

Q: Where do Russian cows originate from?

A: Moscow!

Q: In what state will you find the most cows?

A: Moo York!

Q: What do you get if you mix a longhorn with a knight?

A: Sir Loin!

Q: What happened to the lost cow?

A: Nobody has herd (heard) anything yet!

Q: What do you get if you mix a steer and a chicken?

A: Roost beef!

Q: What do you get from a cowmedian?

A: Udderly silly jokes!

Q: What do you get from a cow on the North Pole?

A: Cold milk!

Q: What do you get if you mix a cow with a spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?

A: A cockerpoodlemooo!

Q: What do you get if you mix a cow with a vampire?

A: Dracowla!

Q: What do you call a cow who works for a gardener?

A: A lawn moower.

Q: What kind of cows do you find in Alaska?

A: Eskimoos!

Q: What do cows do for entertainment?

A: They go to the moovies.

Q: What goes oooooo?

A: A cow with no lips!

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Maze 1



Maze 2



Maze 3



Maze 4



Maze Solutions



About the Author



Arnie Lightning is a dreamer. He believes that everyone should dream big and not be afraid to take chances to make their dreams come true. Arnie enjoys writing, reading, doodling, and traveling. In his free time, he likes to play video games and run. Arnie lives in Mississippi where he graduated from The University of Southern Mississippi in Hattiesburg, MS.

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